Work guilt and finding your balance

January has not really been the month for me up till now. Started the month strong but I fell sick right into the second week, what felt like a mild throat infection and cold turned out to be something worse, typhoid and I found that out this week (3rd week of Jan). This is my 4th time, not the best right, I have been quite low about it since I found out and I am still recovering both physically and mentally. I am glad that I am still able to do my daily chores at a reduced efficiency & energy level I guess, I am able to do mild workouts, be active around the house, I am truly grateful that my body is able to fight this.

If you have read my previous blog (https://www.anishaghosh.com/post/my-weight-loss-journey) you would know that I had typhoid when I was 10, and it happened again the year after that, and then 8 years later in college, and finally now. I have been very careful about what water I drink, I spent so much money just on packaged water when I went to Thailand because I don't drink water from a tap ever, or any water which is not from a filter, etc etc. Well, can't help that it happened again but a lot of things have been sort of on my mind since then, let's begin :) 

I am quite a high-functioning adult I think, I mean on my weekdays, I give a lot of importance to my work because I truly enjoy it and over most weekends, I try to do something new or exciting or the usual, meet my friends, clean up my room, do any pending chores, etc. And naturally, when I fall sick, I feel really out of it, I get quite fidgety because a lot of my daily routine has gone for a toss, and this time around when it's the beginning of the year and I thought it was gonna be super energetic, I haven't felt weaker. 

I am trying to still do things I like to do and take care of myself as well, that's when I even started this blog. So well, something good came out of it because finding the time to do other things is quite hard at times. 

Last week and this week, I had so many things to do at work but I barely made progress because of my health and that made me feel really guilty because I had just so many things to get to and complete but my mind and body didn't cooperate. All my colleagues do say that I shouldn't feel that way about work and it's not healthy, I completely understand that. This is why I am trying to take a break while I can and get back stronger. Last week when I did try to work, I felt like I was not at my peak, I felt like I was slower than ever. But I am hoping to get better soon and get back to work! At the same time, I am finally chilling maybe, I haven't watched a new show in forever, and haven't baked or cooked anything in a while, so let's see maybe I'll get to those because they definitely are more on the recreational side of things.

I am still learning how to find a balance, people keep mentioning work-life balance and also tell me that mine isn't ideal, but isn't that something super subjective. Well, for me my work-life balance implies that on most of the weekdays, I give it my 100% and then over the weekends I get to the things not related to work, technically your work is also a part of your life and it's all about finding out what works for you at the end of the day. If during a week I have to get to something more important than work, I will get to it because there are things like my family, and friends that I do prioritize when they want or need me to be there and vice versa!